{Warm Afternoon Green Tea Addiction}

10.28.2004

i guess my life, or my stories are pretty boring lately...

everyday, i came home from work, all i can think of is my day of teaching, what the students have told me, how they react and ... even their faces...pretty terrible i know.

sometimes i sit down, trying to think of something to write, all i can think of is still about my work, which is....teaching! (Bingo!!) pretty lame, and pretty crazy, hun?? i even dream about my classes all the time...believe it or not...

anyways....

so, i am still looking for:

@ pair of hiking boots,
@ sometime in the week to start my guitar lessons;
@ sometime to make a great meal, some "suei-jiao"(dumplings);
@ nice resting corner...for my hot tea and my good book (that's what i need most for now i guess...);
@ and more ...
@ and more....

life isn't boring now....yet when i really think about it, there's nothing so special as well...
mm...ai ya ya...at least i remember one sentence of my limited french: "c'est la vie!"

10.22.2004

what will you do if your students, say like 50 of them, don't give a shit of what you teach on the stage???

in fact, i had to admit that those punks are much better behave (being a student) lately... but i think maybe it is out of the exact reason that they start to do whatever they like in my class.

so these were what they did in my class today....there were some:

*sleeping/snoring
*chatting and laughing
*note-passing/flying around
*make-up doing...eye liners, and lipstick flying
*camera flashing.....Ouch!! that actually hurt my eyes!!!
*staring....always! there are always some pair of eyes staring at me, spying on me every second on my every move....SCARY!

many teachers gave me advise on those punks, telling me to be meaner and louder to them. well, i can't...or to be exact, i refuse to. I refuse to make myself a b*teaching teacher anyhow. I only respect them and hopefully i can get it back......in the future....maybe!

just thought that it'd be interesting to share the experience of being a "weak" teacher, and thinking what other people will do if they were me.........

BY the way, yup!!! I have never finished a snickers bar before, ever.... mmm...big deal to me!!!I honestly love the taste of it, it is actually the only chocolate that I like and will eat, and yes, i am too chicken shit to finish the whole bar every time i open one.........poor Ryan!!!

10.18.2004

sitting here in a internet cafe...i'm thinking what to write within the 2o minutes left for this one hour time limit...

yeah my laptop in the room is fuckedup...and here i'm sitting in this smoky netcafe and using this gross key board again...

why am i writing a blog?? this question just stroke me minutes ago.....
yeah, why exactly?? not an easy answer for me at least!

i write a blog because just incase someone might be interested and read it??? maybe! not completely!

i write becasue there's a slightly hope that i could be a writer?? Haha....who am i fooling??? No!

I write because my friends and maybe my family can understand me more, somehow?? Mm...perhaps for my friends....my family??? i hope they never find out!

i write beacause i could be seen and maybe get some responds from others??? Ha ha....NOPE! although, it's always nice to get some comments, good or bad.

i guess i got it...i write because i kinda interested in why people want to do it by doing it myself...and i write it because my hands happen to be free, and my eyes are not reading my books or watching any tv or movies...

i write because... i wanted to know how true and honest i can be while i'm presented in the public. yup! that's it...now i remember why i started it all of a sudden!

and maybe sometimes there's just no absolute answers to any questions....

damn! i was gonna write how shitty and "foolish" today has been and how many surprises life could sometimes bring you...even when you are so frustrated snd full of dread.

iris

10.17.2004

this weekend, bluest pacific ocean, me, my camera and rye...

10.15.2004

have ya had any passion for a holiday??? for sure I guess....passion for the christmas, for the new year's count down.....but for the "Halloween"???

well, to be honest, i've never really dress-up to any halloween before ever in my life.....

and well, i guess you would had been like me, feeling a bit crazy about this coming holiday, if you have a boyfriend like mine who talks about the Halloween party and dresses since the second day the party was over.......

So, yeah...about 3 months ago the word halloween had constantly heard in my ears, halloween this and halloween that...bla...bla b..la........

and so yeah...guess what i have been doing with him? Exactly!!! Buying custumes!!!!
we are going to dress up like xxxxxx.... that!

Just thought it is such a weired thing that me, even me would also be wried up to all this silly stuff....(oops!) that i even found myself subconsciously looking for the custumes al the time when i walked on the streets. It is damn contagious.....Halloween, that is!!!

iris

10.12.2004

i don't get it, why are hiking boots so damn heavy and hard.....

me and rye have been looking for a good pair of nice hiking boots in hualien...i know, really hard to find anything nice and things you desire here in a small town...anyhow, we tried every little shop that had possible to sell "hiking boots" here. only two out of maybe..ten? that sell them. i tried all of them...

BUT jeezzz...why are they so uncomfortable??????? first, they are not light. second, they are so rough....so my feeling of hiking boots turned out something like putting on a pair of high hill.......They are difficult to walk on, they hurt your feet, or to be more specific, your toes...they simply make walking feels harder...at least to me.

and they say, hiking boots are good for you when you do a long walk, they also protect your angles....etc...i don't know all about that, but they really got me thinking though...

well, what am i trying to prove here??? i an'it an expert of nothing. one thing maybe for sure is my yarning to leave this town, to travel, out of this everyday teaching job right now. i guess getting my hiking boots is one of the ways i could have temporally excitement of escaping the feeling of everyday life here......

but man are those damn shoes unwearable!!!! ......:P

10.08.2004

this is me, too!!

10.06.2004

proud of CKS

winter in taiwan may not be coming yet...
however, autumn definitely is now....

i was driving away from the highschool where i teach (thank god, i don't have to be there all day like other miserable teachers)...
Looking the clear blue sky where there's only few clouds hanging and feeling the cool fresh breeze blowing through my car window, i was thinking to myself: why do i have to work like a slave???

me: i don't think that i enjoy teaching anymore...i don't look forward to teaching and seeing my students anymore...
ryan: well.....work is work...i never really look forward to it. i do my job and play hard on the weekend.
me: but i used to look for it all the time, teaching made me excited......now i just wish the day ends quickly :(...

anyways....anyways...

love the feeling that the winter monsoon has come, the cool air blows my hairs so messy, and the trees everywhere are swinging....it just all of a sudden feels so free and untamed...love it....

if there's anything good about my recent life...the fact that autumn is here could probably be it...

can't remember why i always say i love summer, whenever i'm asked what's your favorite season in taiwan......